Final (Fears Pressure)

 Fear's Pressure

    My final self-portrait, "Fear's Pressure", I used photoshop to create this image by using multiple images of media in order to create this story whether it is using pixel manipulation, filters, and many other effects needed to create this story. The idea behind the creation and production of my image was based off recent real-life events that has put me through a world of confusing and sad emotions that I had to bare for a pretty long-time that I am still kind of going through. I thought that a good alternative of dealing with my problems and emotions is to express it through my art and being able to show other people some of the human struggles we may share at one point in our lives. This piece also helps expresses the feelings we may have and the pressure you may feel in some situations.

    My final piece "Fear's Pressure" is about being within a problems that entangles you in fear and confusion, fearing that the actions you may take will ruin everything around you including the friendships you retain, your reputation, your ability to be confident in your decisions, the way you and other people see your image and the actions you've taken. These thoughts are some of the thoughts that make you feel frozen in time and stuck in the mud, where it feels like the pressure of the world is on your shoulders, knowing that one of those solutions to all of your problems will cause you to lose something you enjoy and find valuable in your life. The piece mainly deals with the problems of fearing for becoming socially isolated, stranded, and the pressure and stress that is created by these thought out fears.

    In the piece I am shown standing near a wall being overtaken by ivy plants. The incontrollable growth of the ivy plants on the wall resembles the never ending problems that occur to keep coming into my life, feeling as if there is no end to these problems to face and entangling me into a pit of stress and fear making me feel scared of what to do. The silhouette of the peoples hands resembles the fear of self image, social isolation, and the fear of poor decision making. I think this part really glues all concepts together because of the way you are already stuck in the wall of ivy, there are these hands that aren't really there, but you feel consuming your mind and thoughts being put into that frozen state of time where you're put at a crossroad of thoughts. The red is my finishing detail, resembling that frozen state in time and how these fears create this filter of fear that just consumes your whole mental state. The red makes the whole image bolder, yet suppresses a lot of those warmer emotions. Though red is a warm color, I do believe that this red filter makes the emotion much more colder and dense that ties in all of these feelings of fear and being scared of the future.

    One artist that has inspired me and I have been able to relate my art to was Silda. Silda is a digital painter that expresses these uncomfortable ideas through her work. I think that initial idea of showing others really uncomfortable ideas may seem weird, but I also think it is really important to show others in order to understand some of these concepts of facing your fears or how to avoid them. Her art really inspired me to express a really uncomfortable situation that I have gone through in order to show others that these fears are to be faced and to show that you are not the only one who goes through these situations. I also think that showing people these uncomfortable ideas is to teach them not to put themselves through something like this again and to show how they have learned to rethink their own decisions next time too.

    Another artist that I felt that I have been able to relate my work to that we've discussed in class is Carrie Mae Weems's. Upon looking at my art, I've seen that Weems's art and mine really show those times of struggles and one way that we can express our problems and troublesome topics is through the use of art. I think that one thing that one quote that has really brought an impact to my work is Weems's stating, "I think that most work that’s made by Black artists is considered to be about Blackness. Unlike work that’s made by white artists, which is assumed to be universal at its core.” Though her quote talks about races, I think that one things that we both are conveying through our art is the concepts that we portray through our art doesn't just relate to people who are going through a rough time or people of a certain color, these pieces can relate to anyone and everybody has their own little issues where they may have felt like this.

    Another quote that I have found that has helped me create my piece was, “Being able to exist in your own body and understand that you do not need to be defined by an experience—arrest and incarceration—allows you to move forward with a little more sense of joy,” said by Shaun Leonardo. Leonardo's quote helped me create this piece to show that I won't let the bad experiences that I go through overwhelm me and get the best of me. I take these experiences and learn from them and move forward. This experience that I went through has helped me create a piece of art, but it also helped me create and show others an important concept and lesson.

    I have found a lot of the performance artists very relatable on my art piece because of the way some people may feel that their work is a little uncomfortable to watch and maybe see, I also express an uncomfortable idea as well that I want others to see. Another quote from Leonardo that I was able to relate to was when he said, "To get anyone to start imagining possibilities for themselves again, that is what we all should be after.” I think that an important part to creating my piece was to get to point out a problem in my life and to show it to everyone. Not only to teach others about a common problem we may have, but it was a way I was able to move on and keep doing what I need to do in order to start believing in myself again after feeling not so confident.